My (disoragnized) thoughts on Pregnancy.

I am happy to report that since getting the Nausea and Vomiting under control at 13 weeks I have not had another episode of throwing up! I do still get nauseous when I try to cut down the diclectin from 1 tab twice a day to 1 tab daily. So for now, I will keep taking it.

It took a few weeks, but my appetite for a variety of food is back and in full swing. I still don’t like the following things: Spinach, Kale, Almond Milk, Coconut Milk, Edamame. But everything else is a go! I can eat salads, soups, sandwiches, chocolate, you name it ;) I also am enjoying cooking again, which is a relief on both my bank account and the scale. I don’t weigh myself, and I know I have gained weight in my arms, thighs, butt, boobs, face, and belly (obvi), but I feel like since I have started eating back in my old semi-healthy ways that the weight gain has substantially slowed (which is good).

There is nothing like pregnancy to really make you aware of what your ingesting. I’ve found this baby loves tea, ham, and cheese. Weird. The first trimester was all about the “Three B’s” haha – Beefaroni, Bagels, and Blizzards. I’ve also found that no negative feelings have come up for my body, or my body image, or how I am eating. I am simply taking it as it comes, and realizing that it is not permanent and in the future if I wish to lose the weight I can and in a healthy way.

I see all these Mom’s on Instagram who are like OMG-I-NEED-TO-GET-TO-PRE-BABY-WEIGHT-RIGHT-NOW. It’s a bit disheartening to see them focusing on being so OMGHEALTHY. I don’t think I am going to be one of them, at least not at first. I know how important exercise and eating healthy is to my well-being, but I am not going to give up precious newborn time to make sure I am getting in crazy workouts every day and restricting my calories to the point where my breast milk dries up. #NotWorthIt

I’m undecided if I am going to go back to being a vegetarian post-pregnancy. Some days it sounds like a good idea and some days I just want to be more of a flexitarian and eat meat once in a while. Right now I am eating meat probably every 2 days. It’s usually chicken. I am still very picky about my meat though and I will spit it out or cut around the fat if I see/taste any.

My boobs are gigantic. Like woah. I had to buy a bra extender because I think my ribcage has expanded past the 36in DD’s I have. At least that’s what I am telling myself. Fun fact: I have colostrum! Every few weeks I would try to hand express some, not for very long, just a squeeze here and there, and last week I got some out! That makes me super happy. Although after I got it out I immediately thought I was going to send myself into pre-term labor and vowed to not do it again. Did you know nipple stimulation is one of the only proven natural ways to induce labor? I plan to start regularly hand expressing at 38 weeks and saving that gold until baby comes. Another fun fact: Your body will produce colostrum until after the placenta detaches, so you don’t need to worry about “running out” or having it turn into fore-milk and hind-milk.

I definitely look more chubby than pregnant at the moment, but when I feel my uterus it feels massive. Oh man, what am I going to say in another 4 months?!

I have done well with my exercise. Walking probably 4-5 times a week and then teaching spin twice a week. I’d like to add some light strength training in for my legs and arms so I am considering starting to do a Jillian Michaels DVD 3 times a week with light weights.

I will be honest…. I am sick of people telling me “You look great!” I know it is just people being polite because at this point, I know I don’t look great. I look okay, don’t get me wrong, and I 100% love my body for doing the coolest thing it’s ever done by building a baby, but this body doesn’t look great. It looks a bit tired and soft.

I resigned from my position in maternity. Nights were killing me. I was such a lazy piece when I would work them. And I never slept well during the day, usually 3.5-5 hours max. I would be thanking god if I got 6 hours and I have NEVER slept more than that. So I am going to do the casual thing until my maternity leave! Between psych, the remand, and maternity I will hopefully be able to get enough shifts to make the max for mat leave.

I always thought I would be the mom to go back to work when maternity leave was over, hence why I was so focused on getting a position. But after some realistic talks with Matthias about his job (he works out-of-town), and the lack of child care coverage for shift workers, I have decided to just be casual when I go back to work. I will hopefully work a few shifts when Matthias is on his days off, otherwise I will stay at home with little baby when he is working. It will be cheaper that way, and I don’t have a ton of family that can help out and watch the baby when I am doing crazy things like working nights!

I have another ultrasound tomorrow. Little baby was running a marathon in my belly last time and they couldn’t get a good view of everything! I consider myself lucky because little baby was also being a little shit and kept her foot right in the way of seeing her gender for 100% certainty. The tech did say it was 60% chance a girl… so we went with that and now she has a name and all that fun stuff. If I find out it’s actually a boy I will be SOOOOO shocked.

I wonder if my dogs know or get a sense of what is happening? I thought it would be more obvious, that they would somehow magically tell me they knew I was pregnant, but nope. They seem oblivious.

I live for baby kicks and movement. Feeling those is my favorite part of my day <3

Exercise: Pregnancy Edition

Pregnancy is THE time to listen to your body. In the past, I haven’t been very good at this, and it had led to over exercising, amenorrhea, and injury. Pre-pregnancy, I felt as though I had found a place where my exercise was consistent, varied, and healthy.

As much as I wanted to yoga, crossfit, run, and spin up a storm during pregnancy, when I was sick, there was movement to and from work, and to and from the couch, and that was pretty much it. I think I managed to walk my poor dogs 4 times over the 7 week span I was feeling awful? Not good!

At week 13 when I started to feel better, I knew my fitness level had declined substantially and that I needed to respect that. Having a “fit pregnancy” to me, means listening to your changing body and finding ways to be active without over exerting yourself. Here is what I am doing at week 17 to stay fit:

  • Spin – I teach 2 classes a week. The classes have a range of beginners to folks who do Olympic distance triathlons, so I need to strike a balance between the two groups to make sure both are feeling challenged enough. The great thing about spin is that you can modify to your current fitness level! Don’t want to speed up your legs/add resistance/stand up? Cool :) Don’t! Maybe next class, or a few classes later you will feel ready to do these things. As the instructor, I have to set a pace for the class. But as a mom-to-be I need to know that I can’t push myself like I used to. Right now, I modify my sprints to be at 90-100 RPM’s instead of 110 because it is easier for me to maintain and talk into the microphone without huffing and puffing up a lung. I also reach my max hill sooner than I did before, but I still encourage others to add more tension.
  • Prenatal Yoga – I am enrolled in 1 class per week at my local studio. I am enjoying it so far, as I pretty much stopped all yoga during my nauseous period. My yogability is nowhere near where it was when I was at Yandara but it feels good to roll out my mat and warrior it out. :)
  • Walking – Finally back to walking my dogs! I try to walk them 3-4 times a week, and the distance ranges from 2-5km. Hoping to keep this up even when the weather turns cold.

So that is pretty much what I am doing now to stay active! I know that being active during pregnancy leads to better birthing outcomes, so it is definitely a priority for me, but I also know that my body is doing some pretty extraordinary things now and a little rest isn’t too shabby either ;)clif

Clif Bar sent me a really cool package of goodies as a part of my partnership with Temple Scott Associates. It included some Bars, a Hat, a Gel, a Lip Chap (which I LOVE), and some Chews. They also included a great training guide. I’ve already eaten the bars (duh), but I plan on saving the gel and the chews for when I am in labor. I’ve heard they are great for a glucose boost, and I am sure I won’t be wanting anything too substantial while I am contracting up a storm.

What activity did you do when you were pregnant? How did it change from pre-pregnancy?

What did you eat during labor?

Please talk to your doctor if you are pregnant and have questions about starting/or continuing an exercise regime.

Pregnancy is Hard.

feetSo I have thought a lot over the past 2 months about what I want to say in this space. Recently, I decided what I wanted to say was “goodbye for now,” but now I am not so sure.

This post would be a really long one if I went back over the past 12 weeks. If I told you about the daily vomiting, the never-ending nausea, the dizziness, weakness and weight gain. I was really miserable for 7 weeks. My first trimester was awful. All I could stomach to cook was Beefaroni or plain pasta with butter and Parmesan. I couldn’t look in my fridge, empty the dishwasher, put garbage in the garbage can, or open my pots and pans cupboard without gagging or throwing up.

Now that I am 16 weeks, and taking Diclectin, I am happy to report that the nausea and vomiting has been replaced with back pain. I’d gladly take back pain over throwing up any day. I’m finally happy (again) about being pregnant, because the truth is, when I was really sick, I was not. Add to that all the emotions you feel and I was a mess. A mess. Seriously. I called Matthias crying almost every day. He had no idea what to say or do to make me feel better and really there was nothing he could do. I felt so misplaced. Like someone took my body and changed who I was and I felt lost and alone and sad and tired and sick.

Phew, glad to be over that one. I never imagined pregnancy kicking my ass like it has. But I suppose everyone goes through it differently. And then there is the guilt. Because before I was pregnant, all I wanted was to be pregnant, and then I was, and for the first 6 weeks it was awesome, and then from week 6-13 all I wanted was to never, ever feel like I was feeling again. Of course I was excited about the fact that I am growing a little human, but I didn’t want to feel the way I was feeling.

So I’ve thought about saying goodbye to this space. Because I feel like my life is moving in a direction away from it. It isn’t a bad thing, it isn’t a sad thing, it just is. Not to mention I always wanted to blog about my pregnancy and then when I was feeling like complete shit the last thing I wanted to do was blog about it.

But now, as pregnancy has made me the most indecisive woman in the world, I’m not sure what I want to write, or talk about, or if I even want to say anything at all.

So I guess I wanted to let you know I am here, and I am better now, and I am 16 weeks pregnant and we get to find out if it’s a boy or a girl in 18 days. Matthias and I are so excited for this adventure ahead of us.

Thursday Thoughts

  1. I think I might be the only person in Red Deer to be wishing for rain and temps that are a BIT cooler. I know, shoot me. I seriously feel like I have had such a “long” summer already because I was in Mexico at the end of May and it has been pretty nice since I got back. I wasn’t complaining at first but now my lawn is dry, my sprinkler system is broken, and my backyard tap burst from the winter. So basically I had to make shift 2 hoses and a sprinkler and it takes me an hour to water my whole lawn. I also am wishing my Husband would FIX ALL THE THINGS when he comes home.
  2. With the hot hot hot temps I have resulted to closing all my house blinds. This leads my house to look like a cave. Basically I have been living in the dark for the past week because I don’t want to turn on any lights and produce unnecessary light bulb heat.
  3. All this heat has also made me want to rearrange the furniture. I want to move the TV and couches down to the man-cave-turned-yoga-room-turned-kitty-birthing-suite and turn that into the “TV room” and then turn the upstairs into a Living Room. I know this is silly because we are hopefully moving at some point, and I would also regret it in the winter, but all I want is to not stick to my leather couches.
  4. My baby kitties eyes are opening! So my cat had kittens the day before my birthday. It was pretty rad. I got home from work and she was underneath a box in our basement and I had to get her out and into her birthing suite. She had already had a kitten and it was like hanging out of her butt because she hadn’t cut the cord or eaten the placenta yet. Anyways the kitten was fine and when she got into the room she went ahead with her buisness and delivered 3 more healthy babies! 2 orange and 2 grey. They are so sweet. They hiss at me when I go in the room and today one of the grey ones bit my finger. It didn’t hurt but it sure startled me lol. Oakley is the best Mama cat out there. She purrs all the time and takes really good care of her babes. She’s a natural :) Makes my heart swell with love.

It’s hard to get a good picture of them because they move around so much!

kitties photo 1-1


Recent Happenings

Sorry for the disappearance again. I’ve been working lots and then Matthias was home so we were busy with house stuff!

  • We had our 1 year wedding anniversary on the 6, and that same day marked 9 years of love. Matthias was at work, so we celebrated when he got home by going out for supper at Boulevard. It was delicious. They are a great restaurant.
  • I had my 24th birthday! I worked, but it was cool because I got to spend the day surrounded by babies that shared the same birthday as me. How cool is that?! After, Matthias and my Dad went for supper at Earls. I really wanted to eat on the patio, but a storm was rolling in, so we ate inside instead. I ordered the Lobster and Prawn Roll and didn’t love it.
  • I think we have decided to stick around Blackfalds for a few more years, but we are now looking to build a house. We put a deposit on a lot and then I had a bit of a freak out because what if we will have to pay 2 mortgages and how does the whole payment and starting of the building process work!? We will only have enough for a down payment with the sale of our house but we can’t very well sell our house now and be homeless until the house is done sometime in January or February. *cue the panic attack* Has anyone gone through the Build Process? Do you have any words of wisdom for us?
  • I saw The Fault In Our Stars recently and let me just say, I will NOT be reading that book. I cried like nobodies business. What a sad story.
  • We got our first CSA Box and it was filled with delicious treats – Beets, Chard, Spinach, Lettuce, Garlic Chutes, and some small Squash.
  • Oh yeah, that being said, our garden got DESTROYED by the hail storm we had recently. Like pummeled. Everything looks like someone went in and ripped everything to shreds. Awesome.

Whats new with you?

Any fun summer happenings?