Thirty Week Thoughts

We are into the single digits people! Today I am 30 weeks and 1 day pregnant, which means I have roughly 9 weeks and 6 days left. I plan to start doing some things to get labor going at 38 weeks, so hopefully (fingers crooooosssed!) I don’t make it to the 40 week mark. If I could pick the day little lady would make her entrance it would have to be March 18th, because that’s my dad’s birthday, but that is 1 day off from my due date, so I am kind of hoping she comes a bit before then! No later than March 27th, because my doula will be in Hawaii, and I would be an absolute mess without her as her and Matthias are going to be the only ones in the room with me!

I threw my back out on Sunday really badly. My one cat was attacking my other cat and I got off the couch to throw her away and when I twisted to sit back down my entire low back had a huge spasm and I had to like roll off the couch really awkwardly to make the pain subside. Matthias was home and he was a bit panicked because I was writhing around in agony for about 10 minutes, and then I was REALLY stiff afterwards for about 3 days. Monday and Tuesday I got into the Chiropractor and I am so happy to report that it is feeling about 85% better now! No longer stiff unless I sit for an extended period.

This got me thinking about Labor Pain vs. Pain in General and my hopes for labor pain management. When my back was super sore for more than a day it felt so debilitating because I knew there was other things I needed to be doing in my down time (like the dishes and the laundry, and walking the dogs, and grocery shopping, ext…). Chronic pain is so challenging because life still needs to go on despite the pain. I’ve obviously never experienced labor pain before. I’ve only ever had “cramps” before my period a handful of times (maybe 6 max?) and back in my youth (haha) I would get some back pain prior to my period but nothing excessive. The only “real pain” I’ve had to manage is getting tattoos (my longest sitting was 3 hours, and man, that was ENOUGH, I was a sweaty, shaking mess), and Sciatica for roughly 4 months. I don’t know what a painful Braxton Hick Contraction feels like. I don’t know what a REAL Contraction feels like. I don’t know what Dilating to 10cm feels like. I don’t know what the Ring of fire feels like. But what I realized is, when labor starts, everything else in life will be put on the back burner. I won’t need to do the dishes or scrub the bathroom or feel like I need to do fun things with Matthias when he is home on his days off. I wont NEED to walk the dogs, but it might speed up labor so it might be a good thing to do haha. When Labor starts, all I will need to do is focus on being in and getting through labor. So that is what I will try my hardest to focus on when the time comes. Presence and Management.

Because I have a midwife (who is totes awesome), its not easy for me to say “Oh yeah, I want an epidural.” Having a midwife complicates that a bit. With a midwife, I won’t be assigned a hospital nurse unless I do get an epidural, and even then, my getting an epidural is based on their current staffing level (if everyone is busy and I can’t get a nurse, I wont be getting an epidural). In an ideal world, I wont need one or want one. I do have the “drug free mindset” going in to labor. I know the negative effects that the medications have, and I know the complications that can come from having an epidural. I’d like to avoid those if at all possible because most (if not all) of the medications they give to manage pain, if given not at precisely the right time, can significantly slow down labor and increase you risk of having a c-section. My primary method of pain management will be the birthing pool, and I am open to laughing gas, because if anything it’ll at least make you breath during the contractions.

At the end of the day, the only thing that matters is the safety of the baby and myself, so if a c-section is necessary, then obviously that will be okay, but if at all possible I want to avoid all of that. That being said, I am not the type of woman that “needs” to have a vaginal delivery to make me feel like a true woman. I just really want my baby to come out safe and healthy :)

I am meeting with my doula soon to create a birth plan (woah!) and I have prentatal classes with Matthias next weekend :)

Things are progressing nicely! I still feel good, I’ve decreased my diclectin to once a day and with try to cut it out totally by 32 weeks, and I am still teaching spin once a week! I still don’t know how much weight I’ve gained, and I still don’t really care all that much.

I’ll probably talk more about my birth plan once its all created… but it wont be anything extravagant because I know the less expectations I have the happier I will be with the outcome of the birth!

My Never Ending Quest for Pizza While Pregnant

So I have a somewhat funny, somewhat depressing, story to share.

It involves Pizza. And Pregnancy. (Pregnancy = Tears and Hormones)

Okay. So Pizza. An awesome food. So many places to order it from, its fairly easy to find a Pizza place that you like, and therefore keep going back to on a regular basis.

For some reason, every time I have ordered pizza while pregnant, I have been unsuccessful at satisfying my craving. How many times have I ordered Pizza during this pregnancy? 6 or 7. How many times has there been something wrong or something unsatisfying about the pizza that I have tried to order this pregnancy? 6 or 7. I kid you not.

I ordered pizza from a place in Blackfalds (I dont remember which one). I wanted a Cheese Pizza. Nothing fancy. Just some tomato sauce and some mozzarella and cheddar. This was back in the first trimester when nothing but Carbs and Dairy sounded appealing. The pizza that was delivered was pretty much crust with tomato sauce and an entire block of cheese grated on top. We are talking like a half an inch thick at least worth of cheese. It was just too much (even for me!) and so I didn’t enjoy it.

I really wanted Pepperoni pizza one night, so I ordered it from Piccolos in Blackfalds. I had heard good reviews for them, and come on, Pepperoni pizza is pretty hard to screw up. The pizza I got had the huge slices of Pepperoni that almost taste kind of like Bologna. You know what I mean right? Not the delicious and kind-of-spicy little round pieces of pepperoni that EVERYWHERE ELSE USES, but the nasty huge squares of it. And probably like 3 layers of it. All over the pizza. Gross.

Then there was the time I ordered Boston Pizza. I did a build your own. With Corn Salsa, Feta, Cheddar, Peppers, and Ham. Well I got home and bit into the pizza and all that was on it was Corn Salsa, Peppers, and Cheese. No Ham. So now, I have a credit for the cost of ham on my account for the next time I go to the Blackfalds BP’s. Awesome…

When we were in Germany our hotel had a Pizza restaurant attached to it. Naturally, we ate there one night because it was closed and it had good reviews on Trip Advisor. So we go in and I order a 4 cheese pizza and Matthias orders something with Ham and Olives (gross). Well, my 4 cheese pizza comes out with gigantic blobs of blue cheese melted all over the pizza. There are only 2 types of Cheese I don’t like. Goat and Blue. You couldn’t even eat around the pizza without getting the Blue cheese flavor in your mouth.

We ended up eating at the same restaurant again the night before we left out of convenience. This time, we wanted to split one pizza and order a salad. Apparently they cant put 1 pizza on a plate and bring out an empty plate (cheap bastards) so we had to order 2 pizzas and a salad. I decided to stick with the classic Ham and Pineapple. I think they basically just opened a can of Pineapple and poured it over the entire pizza because the pizza was so moist and watery that I had to use my napkin to soak up some of the excess pineapple juice that was running everywhere.

So that brings us to now. The last 2 nights at work, a co-worker said he was going to bring in Pizza for the patients and staff. So I didn’t bring supper the one night…. and he never showed up. I ended up just eating the snacks I had brought, and then eating toast at home after work. The patients ended up ordering a pizza themselves, and it smelled heavenly.

The next night, same thing. I am expecting Pizza and only brought 1/2 an avocado and bread to make avocado toast as a snack. No pizza shows up. And again, the patients order another pizza that smells just divine. So that is TWO nights in a row that I have craved Pizza and not been able to eat any.

Today was my day off. I told Matthias we were having Pizza and he suggested Famoso, which we have enjoyed in the past. I was looking forward to it ALL DAY LONG. We each ordered a pizza and then gelato for desert. I opted for the CAVOLETTI  which has: Oven-roasted Brussels sprouts, prosciutto crisps, gorgonzola cheese, dates, walnuts, drizzle of honey. Sounds delicious right? And gorgonzola cheesse? Never had it. But I (wrongly) assumed it was something smokey like Gouda.

So my Pizza comes out and I dig in, and its pretty good for the first 2 or 3 bites. And then I get a bite that tastes like Blue cheese. I thought maybe it was the Proscuitto, and my mind was playing a trick on me. So I picked off all the proscuitto and gave it to Matthias (who ordered something with Ham and olives, so predictable, so gross haha). I finish that slice and dig in to another one, and I bite into a huge chunk of Blue cheese. There was no mistaking it this time. So I ask Matthias, “Is Gorgonzola Cheese a type of Blue Cheese?” He says “No, I don’t think so.”

So I google it.

And it is.

So what does any rational emotional pregnant lady do? Start crying in the restaurant, of course. Matthias is laughing a bit (but not in a mean way) because he can’t even share his pizza with me (olives), and tells me to order another pizza and that we can run over to Superstore and grab our groceries and pick it up on the way home. I said no, that it was okay, I wasn’t in the mood for pizza anymore. And then I started to think about all of the pizza fails I have had over the last 7 months and I had to kind of chuckle about it. I think the only time I have really enjoyed pizza this pregnancy is when I made Naan Bread pizza at home.

The sad thing is, I LOVED every other topping on that pizza from Famoso, and I will definitely order it again next time I go, but with mozzarella or cheddar instead of gorgonzola. I just wish someone had pre-warned me that gorgonzola was a type of blue cheese, or that I hadn’t been an ass and assumed it would be something I liked.

Whats your Favorite kind of Pizza?

Mine is usually Vegetarian, but now that I am eating meat again I have really liked the idea of Ham and Pineapple.

Any Pizza toppings you hate?

Olives. Large Chunks of Mushrooms. Apparently Gorgonzola Cheese.

Whats your favorite local pizza place?

Sadly, I don’t have one right now. :(

2014 in Review; Flexibility

Well I, for one, can’t believe it is already going to be a new year. 2014 seemed to fly by! I have to say, it has 100% been my most favorite year yet. I know I stepped away from the blog world a bit for most of it, but in doing so, I created some great memories, a baby (which is still being created ;) ) and I learned a whole lot about myself and my happiness.

I picked the word Flexibility for 2014, and in doing so, prioritized 3 goals, including physical flexibility, financial flexibility, and emotional flexibility.

fallenangel Physical

Much of the first half of 2014 was spent on the “Physical” aspect of increasing my flexibility. I let go of my gym membership and crossfit membership and bought an unlimited Yoga pass at a local studio. In March, I participated in a Yoga Instagram Challenge. I signed up for Yoga Teacher Training, at Yandara, and wrote about it in 3 parts (Here, Here, and Here). Yandara really was a life changing experience for me. I came out of it feeling physically and emotionally centered, something that is hard to achieve in our go-go-go society. From January to July, my physical flexibility increased a lot. It’s hard to quantify, but I was able to do yoga postures I had only dreamed about doing before. And it felt really good. Then things took a turn when my nausea and vomiting started. I fell off the yoga band wagon pretty hard, and have yet to find my way back to it. All in all though, that is okay, because by letting go of my physical flexibility I was able to focus more on my emotional flexibility.


Emotionally, I think things started to turn around when I spent my time at Yandara. After that, I was ready to let go of the control I was trying to have over getting pregnant, and instead, just focus on living. Well surprise, surprise, I got pregnant a mere 2 weeks after returning home. This in turn led me through an emotional release so-to-speak. I had all of these expectations and assumptions about being pregnant. How I would feel, what I would do and not do, what I would eat, how I would look. Pregnancy has been the single biggest wake up call of my life. I have realized with great certainty, that planning is a feeble thing, and I am only safe to believe that none of my plans will ever go, well, as planned haha. I was sick and miserable. I felt emotionally torn about becoming a mother when I didn’t “have” a mother, and for a bit, I felt a little bit lost. I’ve worked hard on overcoming this hurdle, accepting things as they are, and acknowledging that in protecting my physical health, I am also protecting my emotional health. I am so looking forward to being a mother, to loving the little girl who made me so sick at first, and whose flips and punches and kicks make my heart already feel like it can’t fit in to my chest.


Well….. this is probably the one I slacked off most in. I indulged this year on more than one occasion. I went to Mexico for Yoga Training, then again in December for a Vacation. I went to Germany, and to Switzerland. I took a Graduate level course through a very expensive online school, and I plan to continue taking more of them in the new year. Matthias bought a Motorcycle. I purchased a lot of furniture for my house, and I hired cleaners to come in and clean for me. I payed for prenatal yoga that I never attended. Oops. I did manage to pay off my credit card, and lower my credit limit by over half. I also managed to help pay off one of our time shares and pay down the other one by half. I know. Who in their right mind gets TWO time shares? My husband and I apparently. So I suppose all was not lost in this arena, but it definitely could have gone better.

We still have some grand plans to pay down our line of credit by half before the baby comes, but now with trying to finish our basement and our plumbing going to shit (literally.) I am not sure if we will accomplish this by March!


What I’m Reading; Pregnancy Edition

I’m a pretty avid reader. Well, I guess I go in spurts. Sometimes I will read 3 or 4 novels back to back and then need a bit of a break before getting back in to reading. Other times I will chip away slowly at educational books (like about Yoga, or Nutrition, ext…). My favorite genre of books is Chick Lit. But the good stuff, the stuff that makes you L-o-l, not the cheesy-romance-predictable stuff. I also love to devour anything by Harlan Coben. It’s funny because when I read something that I know is going to make me cry, I like tor read in a room alone, so I will often go to the bedroom or the sitting room when Matthias is downstairs in our TV room. When I am ready a Harlan Coben mystery, I get so freaked out I like to read them with Matthias present haha.

One of the things I thought I would do when I was pregnant was read, and so far, that is one of the only assumptions I have actually been right about! Here are the books I have read/am currently reading before little baby arrives.

I like this book because it is broken down into sections of weeks, so 1-4, 4-8, and so on. I started this one, got to the beginning of section of 8-12, and then got sick and stopped reading it. I didn’t start again until we went to Mexico a week and a half ago, so I was really behind. I skimmed through the section of 8-12 and wished I would have read it during the time I was in it! It talked about how they were often the hardest weeks to cope with, which I can relate 100% to. I like that this book has stories from other women, although all the women are older than 30 and they are all British, so some things differ in Canada.

I am really hoping this book will provide me with some insight into natural labor and delivery and pain management techniques that don’t involve drugs. I liked reading all the personal stories, but I got the vibe that these women lived/live on some kind of religious compound based on the way they are written. Interesting though, for sure. Once I got into the part where it talks about the stats and everything that could go wrong, I stopped reading. I don’t need to know that stuff. So I am going to skip over that section and get back into the rest of the book a little closer to my due date so it is fresh in my mind.

An easy read about colicy baby’s and how to manage them. I don’t know that I bought into everything he said, but it still provided some insight into swaddling and co-sleeping and other calming techniques for baby.

I really liked this book! The E.A.S.Y. Routine is something I’d really like to try out when the baby arrives. It makes a lot of sense and can give a loose structure to long days and nights with a newborn and then with an older baby.

This one was more for fun, but I liked it! It isn’t informational so much as it is a narrative and story.

So that’s what is on my bookshelf right now! I’ve generally gone back and forth from fiction to baby book, so that I don’t wear myself out and get bored, but I have really enjoyed learning some new things. Now if only I could get Matthias to read something …. haha

Did you read any good books before having a little one?

Christmas Blog Swap 2014 & Lunch with Lindsey

One of the best things about writing a blog is meeting friends. I consider myself very lucky to have made some great local friends from blogging. Lindsey at A Running Tale is one of those friends. ;) So when I got her in the Christmas Blog Swap, I was super excited because it was a perfect excuse to meet up for lunch and exchange our ornaments.

We met up at 50 West Bistro, a new-er Red Deer restaurant that I believe is locally owned? Regardless, they have delicious food. I ordered the Chili-Lime Chicken Caesar Wrap and the Mediterranean Potato Salad. I am usually VERY picky about my meat, and so I like to inspect it before I eat it to cut off any questionable pieces. This is tricky to do when the meat is wrapped up in a tortilla, but I didn’t have to worry about it because 50 West gave me gristle-free meat that was delish. And the Potato Salad? Well that was YUMMY. I love warm potato salad, and this one had diced tomatoes and onions and Parmesan cheese on top, and NO olives, which of course is a good thing.

Okay enough about lunch! On to the good stuff (the ornament and gift!). Lindsey outdid herself with the 2 ornaments she selected for my tree. She picked out a beautiful little angel with a pink dress (for little Daughter) and a “Silent Night” ornament with a snowflake. Silent Night – get it? Cause I won’t be having many more of those, and none when little Daughter arrives. Haha :) Love the choices! And I will enjoying telling the story to her one day when we are decorating the tree.

IMAG00271Lindsey also spoiled me with 2 of my favorite things – Dark Chocolate from Bernard Callebaut, and a Starbucks Gift Card! We actually ended up getting each other Starbucks Cards, haha we have similar tastes :) And to top it all off she gave little Daughter her first baby gift! Towels, Wash Clothes, Bath Toys, Live Clean Baby Soap and Diaper Cream! So awesome because these were all things I hadn’t even thought of getting yet! Little girl is a lucky one!! :D

So happy I was able to participate in the Blog Swap again this year! I love being introduced to new Canadian Bloggers and I love seeing all the ornaments that get selected each year.