[Currently]

Inspired to do one of these by Nicole. Haven’t done one for a while and it might be a nice way to catch up 😉

[Watching] NOTHING. There is absolutely nothing on TV right now. I just finished the entire series of Gilmore Girls. That pretty much ate up the entire last 6 weeks of my maternity leave lol.

Jess was the best. Amiright?! I hope that Rory ran in to him on her tour during the campaign and they got back together. Maybe that will happen in the Netflix special!? *swoon*

[Reading] I just started Big Magic for Personal Development and The Nightingale for leisure :) Both are good thus far!

       

[Drinking] Tim Hortons Regular at this exact moment, but I’ve been LOVING Strawberry Shakeology lately.

[Training] primarily doing Hammer & Chisel but also throwing in weekly Yoga and a Spin Class. I’m not trying to overdue it especially now that Quinn is in Dayhome because I don’t want to tank my supply just yet. So usually one workout a day, 5ish times a week. Starting to think about signing up for the Woody’s though.. but I also want to do Insanity Max 30… decisions decisions.

[Listening] Anyone listening to Serial Season 2? I didn’t think I would get in to it because its about the US Military but I actually quite like it! Not a fan that its every 2 weeks now though.

[Wearing] my PJ’s still… but I’ve gotten better at wearing real clothes the last few weeks in preparation for my return to work 😉 I even dropped some pants off to get hemmed. *PROFESSIONAL*

[Eating] nothing atm, but my favorite bedtime snack has been 10% Vanilla Greek Yogurt. Super thick and delicious, #allthefat. I mix in a TBSP of dark chocolate popped Quinoa (from Nutters) or of Dark Chocolate chips and it reminds me of stracciatella gelato!

[Loving] Hmmm good question. Loving my Husband for sure. He’s in the process of selling his truck (EEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!! This means SO much for our financial situation). That’s a pretty big sacrifice for him, so he deserves some lovin’.

[Planning] LIFE. I don’t know how single mom’s get everything done in a day. I’m not sure how I’m going to accomplish anything when I go back to work, especially full time! GAH. My day planner has become my bible.

[Dreaming] Of a life without a $1200 monthly truck payment. Fingers crossed this comes to fruition!

[Dreading] Nothing. I don’t particularly look forward to dropping Quinn off at the Dayhome. But I definitely don’t dread it.

[Excited] for the opportunity to TEACH. I’ll be instructing at the College for the next 8ish weeks. I hope it goes well and that I don’t feel like I’m drowning and that I am able to facilitate a quality learning experience for the students. I won’t be talking about it in too much detail in social media/on the blog, but keep me in your thoughts :)

[Thankful] for a healthy daughter. When you learn about the struggle some people are going through, and when you find out about all of the pain and suffering of some children, it really hits home and makes you hug your little ones a little tighter. I’m grateful for every difficult moment and every special moment because some people don’t get either of those and that just isn’t fair. <3

Quinn – 10 Months

Poor girl with her cold

Poor girl with her cold

GROWTH

Weight

Not Measured (Getting close to 20 lb I think)

Height

Not Measured

Head

Not Measured

Clothing

Mostly 12 month stuff, 18 month Pekkle sleepers are still ridiculously big 😉

ROUTINE

Eating

We are at a solid 3 meals a day. Depending on the day I will offer an afternoon snack, but not always. Meals are usually whatever I am having or leftovers from the day before. When Quinn is at the Dayhome I send her with a Lunch, which I actually really like because then I know shes getting good stuff :)

Breastfeeding is going good. She eats anywhere from 4-7 times a day still. When she is at the Dayhome I send her with Formula because I don’t have enough of a stash in the freezer to send her with. This kind of makes me sad, but it is what it is. I plan to breastfeed as long as we can, and on the days shes at the Dayhome for the full day I’ve pumped once or twice.

Night Sleeping

Consistent with last month, however teething plus a cold gave us a few ROUGH days with 3ish wake ups a night. I was TIRED. It’s funny because when she was waking that much when she was younger I didn’t really feeling “tired” at the time, but now when she has some rough nights I feel like I was hit by a truck haha.

Day Sleeping

Still going strong with 2 naps. Quinn naps well at the Dayhome! Cry’s a bit before she falls asleep but that is pretty consistent with being at home and its more of a protest than a “YOUR ABANDONING ME” cry. She naps in one of those little pod things when she is there which is cute but hard to imagine.

DAYHOME

So we started going to the Dayhome this past month as I go back to work in 8 short days. I feel like the whole Going Back to Work thing deserves a post on its own – so maybe I will write about that this week during one of Quinn’s full days at the Dayhome. Our transition looks like this: 1 week with 2 half days, 1 week with 1 half day and 1 full day, and 1 week with 2 full days. From there I go back to work, and she will be going anywhere from 2-4 days a week.

We lucked out and really liked the first Dayhome provider we met with. She is accommodating to my crazy schedule and weird hours, has lots of experience and education, and lives literally a 1 minute drive down the road. The first 3 times (Half Days) I dropped Quinn off I don’t think she really understood what was happening (That I was leaving). She did fine, with no tears, and seemed content enough to be passed off. On the first full day she went she started to tear up/cry/reach for me when I passed her off. She knew what was coming by handing her over. That pretty much ripped out my heart. I didn’t cry, but I had to leave pretty quick because I didn’t want it to get any worse. Now whenever I pass her off to someone she doesnt know she reaches for me and starts to cry because she probably thinks I’m going to leave her. During her days she does okay – a few teary/whiny periods where she probably realizes I’m not there, but other than that she does okay. I’m hopeful this month she will fully adjust to the idea and be okay with it.

HEALTH

With starting at the Dayhome we have had cold’s 3 & 4. She also got her first tooth this month! I think shes working on the second, but its still not quite there.

DEVELOPMENT

Clapping and Waving are the norm now 😉 She understands “Hi”, “Milk”, “Mama”, “Dada”, “Bubba” (Tucker), “Olivia”, “Rosie”, “Hank”, and “Oakley”

She’s a little chatter box, and she can say “Mama” and “Dada” to the correct person, but it is usually when she is upset, otherwise she interchanges them and uses them sporadically. Dada is definitely her favorite word. She also smiles big when I say “Kitty” and “Meow” – She loves crawling after Oakley and Olivia.

Standing all over the place. She pulls herself up on everything now.

PLAYING

She likes to play with anything she can stand on, her activity cube and table are her current favorites. She seems a bit impatient when I try to read to her and she tries to roll off my lap – does this get better? Haha I hope so!

She is more of an observer still at the Dayhome as the other kids are bigger than her, but this last month she has really started to watch big kids play when we are out. She will watch and smile whenever they run around haha.

LIKES

  • Mama
  • Dad (when Mom isn’t around)
  • Cuddle Kitty & Cinnamon (stuffed animals)
  • Crawling behind the Couch
  • Activity Table
  • Baths
  • Trying to Roll off her Change Table
  • My Shoes
  • The Pets (particularly Olivia)
  • Remote Controls

DISLIKES

  • Having her water cup taken away from her
  • When Mama passes her off to anyone else
  • Being in the Carseat for too long
  • Standing for too long and not knowing how to sit back down
  • Diaper Changes
  • Strangers

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Quinn – Our Breastfeeding Journey

IMG_7838 When I was in 2nd year of nursing school I took my Maternity Clinical. It was my first experience with breastfeeding education both for myself, and educating my patients. Prior to this, I was one of those silly 19 year old girls who thought breastfeeding was gross, and why don’t they cover up or leave to feed their kid or just stay home? Yep. That was me.

The summer between 3rd and 4th year is an important one for nursing students. It’s your opportunity to undergrad and work on a hospital unit with a healthcare team. Knowing I loved psych and wanted to preceptor there in my 4th year, I decided to apply to undergrad in postpartum. I had enjoyed my clinical there, and it was also an area I didn’t have very much confidence in, so I thought it would be a good learning opportunity.

I loved my undergrad experience in Postpartum. The women on the unit I work on are amazing. They are supportive, funny, empowering, and strong. They are super smart, and helpful and they provide excellent feedback. I work (and back then, worked) with an amazing team.

I remember my first DAS (Day Admission Surgery AKA Scheduled C-Section). It was her first baby. She was having the C-section because her baby was breech. They came up to the unit after the surgery and I asked that fateful question to the mother – “Would you like to try Breastfeeding?”

Now – a little context here – I was 20 years old. My experience to helping a woman latch a baby for the first time was minimal, I mostly had read about it in the textbooks and watched a few videos on it and played around with a knitted breast model and a baby doll. That poor new mother… if only she knew 😉 lol.

Well .. together she got the baby latched and had a successful feed with all the things you look for as a nurse – good alignment, swallows, drawing suck pattern. I wanted to do a fist pump I was so proud of myself!

During that summer, and then over the year that I worked on postpartum I helped MANY women breastfeed. Women with small nipples, and large nipples, and flat nipples, and inverted nipples, and difficult nipples and “good” nipples. Women who had breastfeed 5 kids prior and who had never breastfed before. Women who weren’t women, they were actually teenage girls, and women who didn’t speak any english.

Going in to motherhood when my midwife asked – “Are you planning to breastfeed?” I thought:

Lady. I was born to breastfeed.

Labor? Scared the shit out of me. Didn’t know if I could handle it. Didn’t know if I could push a baby out of … there.

Breastfeeding? Piece of Cake.

I hate to sound snobby about it, that isn’t my intention at all. But it was the ONE thing about becoming a mother I felt confident about

So Quinn came, and then getting her latched was SUPER awkward the first few times. Lol! It is quite different latching a baby to YOUR nipples. You only have one hand! (The other one is supporting the baby) You can’t adjust the pillows or SEE the way you can when your the one standing at the side of the bed! TOTALLY NOT WHAT I WAS EXPECTING. She latched fairly quickly and went to town with eating. She was a natural.

And then she got transferred to the NICU. My first thought was “NO FORMULA.” Not because I’m against formula, but because there was no clinical reason for Quinn to have formula. Her blood sugars were stable, she was a good birth weight, she had peed and pooped. I wanted my milk to come in, and in order to do that you have to breast feed Q2-3H.

You know what was one of the most shocking parts of our NICU stay? The conflicting information I received regarding breastfeeding. I actually had a nurse tell me I was starving my baby. My baby who was above her birth weight by her 3rd day of life. ABOVE. My baby who peed and pooped round the clock. Had I NOT been a nurse, specifically a nurse with lots of training and experience with breastfeeding – this comment would have shattered me. It was completely inappropriate and insensitive and it’s sad that parents have to deal with these types of comments from health care professionals.

Anyways, it all worked out fine. I successfully busted Quinn out of the NICU on day 6 without supplementing with formula. We came home and then the realization sunk in that I had no idea how to parent lol. But I knew how to breastfeed so at least I could keep her nourished if all else failed! 😉

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I was expecting a baby who ate every 3 – 4 hours like the books tell you. I ended up with a baby who ate every 2 hours from 6am – 6pm all day every day. Nights were a little easier on us thank goodness.

Breastfeeding made me feel like a good mother. Because Quinn had colic she was just so miserable all the time, it felt like if I could feed her she would calm down and be a bit more peaceful. It’s always been something Quinn has been good at – she rarely bites/gums me, she’s always seemed to be pretty quick at eating (probably why she needed to eat every 2 hours), and latching seemed to come naturally to her. She wasn’t tongue tied (hallelujah!). At this point in our journey we haven’t dealt with anything too hard besides some nipple soreness. *knock on wood*

I’m writing this now as Quinn will be starting her transition to Day Home a few days a week in just 2 weeks. I will be returning to work the week of February 8th, when Quinn is just 10.5 months old. It makes me sad to think that our special time together will be changing and coming to an end soon. While I don’t plan to wean her myself (I want that to be her initiation), I do know that it will look different when I go back to work and that she will need to be relying on other primary sources of nutrition very soon. Right now the plan is to hopefully provide 1 or 2 pumped bottles a day, supplement when needed with formula, and then breastfeed around when I work. I took a few days to mourn the idea of this transition, and I feel better about the whole process now. This is a topic for another day though. 😉

I guess it just makes me feel sad that she already will be needing me less, you know? Like this is the first step and then I’m going to wake up tomorrow and she is going to be 18 and moving out and all that stuff.

So I guess that sums up our experience so far. It’s nothing too exciting. But its something that has been far more important to me (and hopefully to her) than I ever realized.

2016; The Year to Build

I’m really excited about the things to come in 2016. I don’t know about you, but I have a pretty good feeling it is going to be an awesome year.

I didn’t pick a word for 2015. I think I was so uncertain of what the year would look like I had trouble narrowing it down to just one thing I wanted to focus on.

Here is a list of all of my past words:

2014 – The Year Of Flexibility

2013 – The Year of Acceptance

2012 – The Year of Transition

2011 – The Year of Serenity

It’s pretty crazy to me that this will be the 5th word I’ve chosen over 6 years.. This blog is getting old! Haha 😉

build /bild/

to establish, increase, or strengthen.

I’ve chosen the word build for a few reasons. I am going to focus “building” in 4 different areas of my life.

  1. Relational – My top priority for the year is continuing to build strong relationships. The two main ones are the relationship with my wonderful husband – my rock, best friend, and the yin to my yang, and the one with Quinn – I want to be very intentional with how I parent Quinn and the relationship we have is one of the most important things in my life. I also want to continue building friendships and meeting new people :)
  2. Business2016 is the year I go Diamond (and above) in my business. I’ve experienced first hand how awesome Beachbody products are, and how fun challenge groups can be. This will be the year I build my team, find my tribe of leaders, and continue to help change lives. If my health and fitness journey is something you resonate with you should totally join me. We can build this from the ground up – and trust me – we CAN build an empire, I plan on it. I’m the type of person you want in your group 😉 Once I set my mind on something I don’t stop until I’ve accomplished it.
  3. Physical – I’d like to build more strength, and build a base of running. Both pretty straight forward. I will complete the Woody’s half marathon this spring. Hence why I need the running base 😉 The strength part is just something I want to work on because it’s been an area I’ve slacked off on in the past.
  4. Financial – I think I set this goal every year lol. This year I want to build a solid foundation of understanding my finances and what impact my decisions have financially. If I could pay off some debt and start to build some savings that would be a bonus. I’m just going to throw this out there and be bold with my resolution: By the end of the year I will have 1 of my student loans paid off, at least half of my line of credit debt paid off, and all of my credit card debt paid off.

Whats your 2016 word?