My (disoragnized) thoughts on Pregnancy.

I am happy to report that since getting the Nausea and Vomiting under control at 13 weeks I have not had another episode of throwing up! I do still get nauseous when I try to cut down the diclectin from 1 tab twice a day to 1 tab daily. So for now, I will keep taking it.

It took a few weeks, but my appetite for a variety of food is back and in full swing. I still don’t like the following things: Spinach, Kale, Almond Milk, Coconut Milk, Edamame. But everything else is a go! I can eat salads, soups, sandwiches, chocolate, you name it 😉 I also am enjoying cooking again, which is a relief on both my bank account and the scale. I don’t weigh myself, and I know I have gained weight in my arms, thighs, butt, boobs, face, and belly (obvi), but I feel like since I have started eating back in my old semi-healthy ways that the weight gain has substantially slowed (which is good).

There is nothing like pregnancy to really make you aware of what your ingesting. I’ve found this baby loves tea, ham, and cheese. Weird. The first trimester was all about the “Three B’s” haha – Beefaroni, Bagels, and Blizzards. I’ve also found that no negative feelings have come up for my body, or my body image, or how I am eating. I am simply taking it as it comes, and realizing that it is not permanent and in the future if I wish to lose the weight I can and in a healthy way.

I see all these Mom’s on Instagram who are like OMG-I-NEED-TO-GET-TO-PRE-BABY-WEIGHT-RIGHT-NOW. It’s a bit disheartening to see them focusing on being so OMGHEALTHY. I don’t think I am going to be one of them, at least not at first. I know how important exercise and eating healthy is to my well-being, but I am not going to give up precious newborn time to make sure I am getting in crazy workouts every day and restricting my calories to the point where my breast milk dries up. #NotWorthIt

I’m undecided if I am going to go back to being a vegetarian post-pregnancy. Some days it sounds like a good idea and some days I just want to be more of a flexitarian and eat meat once in a while. Right now I am eating meat probably every 2 days. It’s usually chicken. I am still very picky about my meat though and I will spit it out or cut around the fat if I see/taste any.

My boobs are gigantic. Like woah. I had to buy a bra extender because I think my ribcage has expanded past the 36in DD’s I have. At least that’s what I am telling myself. Fun fact: I have colostrum! Every few weeks I would try to hand express some, not for very long, just a squeeze here and there, and last week I got some out! That makes me super happy. Although after I got it out I immediately thought I was going to send myself into pre-term labor and vowed to not do it again. Did you know nipple stimulation is one of the only proven natural ways to induce labor? I plan to start regularly hand expressing at 38 weeks and saving that gold until baby comes. Another fun fact: Your body will produce colostrum until after the placenta detaches, so you don’t need to worry about “running out” or having it turn into fore-milk and hind-milk.

I definitely look more chubby than pregnant at the moment, but when I feel my uterus it feels massive. Oh man, what am I going to say in another 4 months?!

I have done well with my exercise. Walking probably 4-5 times a week and then teaching spin twice a week. I’d like to add some light strength training in for my legs and arms so I am considering starting to do a Jillian Michaels DVD 3 times a week with light weights.

I will be honest…. I am sick of people telling me “You look great!” I know it is just people being polite because at this point, I know I don’t look great. I look okay, don’t get me wrong, and I 100% love my body for doing the coolest thing it’s ever done by building a baby, but this body doesn’t look great. It looks a bit tired and soft.

I resigned from my position in maternity. Nights were killing me. I was such a lazy piece when I would work them. And I never slept well during the day, usually 3.5-5 hours max. I would be thanking god if I got 6 hours and I have NEVER slept more than that. So I am going to do the casual thing until my maternity leave! Between psych, the remand, and maternity I will hopefully be able to get enough shifts to make the max for mat leave.

I always thought I would be the mom to go back to work when maternity leave was over, hence why I was so focused on getting a position. But after some realistic talks with Matthias about his job (he works out-of-town), and the lack of child care coverage for shift workers, I have decided to just be casual when I go back to work. I will hopefully work a few shifts when Matthias is on his days off, otherwise I will stay at home with little baby when he is working. It will be cheaper that way, and I don’t have a ton of family that can help out and watch the baby when I am doing crazy things like working nights!

I have another ultrasound tomorrow. Little baby was running a marathon in my belly last time and they couldn’t get a good view of everything! I consider myself lucky because little baby was also being a little shit and kept her foot right in the way of seeing her gender for 100% certainty. The tech did say it was 60% chance a girl… so we went with that and now she has a name and all that fun stuff. If I find out it’s actually a boy I will be SOOOOO shocked.

I wonder if my dogs know or get a sense of what is happening? I thought it would be more obvious, that they would somehow magically tell me they knew I was pregnant, but nope. They seem oblivious.

I live for baby kicks and movement. Feeling those is my favorite part of my day <3

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