Pregnancy Weight Gain

I finally bit the bullet.

I weighed myself this morning at 39 weeks pregnant.

Having a midwife, I didn’t have to track my weight at my appointments if I didn’t want to, as long as my other numbers where in check (blood pressure and fundal height). I’ve always measured 1-2cm behind my current week (at my 39 week appointment I was measuring 37cm), and my blood pressure has hovered around the 90-110/60-75 mark.

When I was so nauseous in the first trimester, I literally ate every two hours. And I will be the first to acknowledge the choices I made were often more unhealthy than healthy. I couldn’t stand the sight of salad, vegetables, and most fruit besides bananas. I wanted carbs, cheese, and more carbs. I was sick for 7 weeks straight. During this time, I did weigh myself a few times. And I felt sad at the numbers I saw because they were very much more than I was supposed to be gaining during my first trimester.

I stopped weighing myself at the 15 week mark with the permission of my midwife because the number I saw did play on my emotions. It didn’t constantly effect me, it didn’t make me want to restrict or binge, but it did play on my self esteem. And that was something I didn’t want to have on my mind during the pregnancy. I wanted to focus on being as healthy as I could within my means to foster the baby’s growth. I didn’t want a silly number to make me feel bad about growing my child. I wanted to, and decided to trust my body to do what it needed to and to gain the weight it was supposed to.

Seeing the number that I saw this morning was… well, not nice. It was definitely more than they recommend you gain in a pregnancy. But it wasn’t earth shattering. It didn’t send me into a depressed state or cry “Woe is Me”. It didn’t make me regret eating McDonalds or drinking all the Tim Horton’s Iced Capps I could get my hands on during the first 14 weeks. It did make me think that maybe it would have been different if I had started taking the Diclectin earlier? Would I have been able to eat vegetables instead of Beefaroni and toast? Would I have kept up more thoroughly with my exercise routine? Continued Yoga every day? Taken more group fitness classes? Would the weight gain have been significantly less if I could have eaten more normally and wasn’t pretty much confined to my bed or the couch for almost 2 months? Those are things I can’t know, because I can’t go back and see. Maybe it would have ended up with the same number on the scale. It’s hard to say.

It did make me very grateful for my husband. My sweet husband who worked away and came home every few weeks probably thought on more than one occasion “Wow” at my changing size. But he never let on to it. He never said anything to make me feel bad, much less to be acutely aware that I looked so starkly different. He touched my belly and said I didn’t look as pregnant as other women who were as far along as I was. He never once made me feel like my pregnant shape was any less desirable than my pre-pregnant shape. Whenever I did let on that I wasn’t feeling super awesome about my body he told me he thought I was beautiful and when I said “I won’t be this size forever” he said it didn’t matter what size I was. How did I get so lucky?

It also made me grateful for my kind friends who all said with sincere enthusiasm “You look great!” and to the people who still don’t 100% realize I am pregnant and say “Oh you can hardly tell!” I honestly don’t get it, and I don’t quite believe it. They are probably just being polite, or they think I’ve gotten insanely fat in a short amount of time, which makes me kind of chuckle. But that is besides the point.

The point I guess I am trying to make is that it is okay that I have gained this weight. I’ve never weighed as much as I weigh now before. None of my pre-pregnancy clothes fit, and probably won’t fit for months after I actually have the baby. My level of fitness is nothing like it was before I was pregnant. But I’ve spent the last 39 weeks letting my body do the coolest thing it has ever done. And I’ve found a way to trust it like I never have before. Those are both priceless life lessons. And there is no place for body shame or weight shame in that. There is only room for love. Love for my body, which has worked so hard to grow my daughter, and love for my daughter, who I hope with all my heart will grow up to love her own body.

 

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14 thoughts on “Pregnancy Weight Gain

  1. Great outlook! I am happy you are not beating yourself up over it. You did what you had to, and have kept active – way more than most would ever even dream of doing! I really do think you look great :) After baby with a little work your body will bounce back. I am a firmer believer that the more active you are during pregnancy helps after, and breastfeeding :) Give your body time and it will probably surprise you.

    • Thanks :) Just have to trust that my body will do what it needs to do now and after the baby comes. Of course once the baby is here I can also focus in on decreasing portion sizes and being more aware of what I am eating, but within reason because I also don’t want to decrease my supply.

  2. The weight gain part of pregnancy is definitely tough! I got a talking to from the doctor after I gained too much in a four week span, but it all evened out by the end. I think you have a great attitude and it will come off post baby :)

  3. It’s all about attitude and you have a great one. You look amazing and your body is doing what it is suppose to. You just never know what will play a part in the amount of weight that is gained during pregnancy and how/if your body bounces right back afterwards. I can attest to the fact that being super freakin active during pregnancy doesn’t mean you won’t gain as much and that you’ll shrink right back to the same size it was afterwards because that certainly wasn’t and hasn’t been the case for me. But everyone is different and healthy attitudes, mamas and babies are really all that matter.

  4. Ohhh I hear you on ALL of this. I hadn’t weighed myself for about 6 months prior to getting pregnant, and at that point I was the happiest I’ve ever been with my body. So when I did get pregnant, I don’t think it really phased me as much because my mind was in such a good place (for once! I’ve had a terrible history with binging/restricting/overexercising). I went from exercising 6x/week and eating super healthy…ok, and drinking a lot…to eating only carbs/sugar and hardly working out.

    My hubs is the same too, AND I’ve honestly never thought I’ve looked sexier than now with a bump. So basically I’m admitting that I love my hips now. That’s a first.

    It’s so crazy to think that we do all of this for these little babies!

  5. I think you have a great attitude about the changes our bodies go through during pregnancy! I had every intention of working out throughout my pregnancy and eating super healthy, and I did neither. I was actually quite surprised at how UNmotivated I was to eat more healthy lol! And for the record, your pre-pregnancy clothes SHOULDN’T fit you right now! 😉 And don’t be discouraged if it takes a few months to fit in them after pregnancy – most of my tops still don’t fit a year postpartum because my boobs got gigantic and I’m still breastfeeding. And I just found my maternity jeans to be way more comfy than my normal ones, haha!

    • My maternity ones would be comfortable if they weren’t constantly falling down! I’ve tried the thick band that covers your whole stomach and the thin band that sits below and no luck. I often feel like I should wear suspenders when I wear them haha.

  6. You have such a great outlook! And yes, pregnancy is a huge change for our bodies and a wonderful thing. Your body is doing what it’s supposed to do and I’m sure once the baby come you will settle into its new normal after a while. As for other people and your husband, I’m sure they mean it! What you see on the scale may not reflect in the mirror in the way you think it does

    • Very true! Thank you for the kind words. You are 100% right that the scale doesn’t always translate in the mirror. I also appreciate you bringing up the “new normal”. My normal won’t be anything like it was before baby and I have to remember that

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